I’ve had this sitting on my hard drive to post for some time and after reading
http://jssubc.blogspot.com/2006/09/fantasy-vs-reality.html (fantasy V’s reality is a good read check it out !!)
if refreshed my memory..I was going delete it
(forgotten posting)
Things can and do go wrong
I was thinking the other night its been awhile since I’ve had anything go wrong on a play. T he odd wrap around off the cat or a mark that took little longer than I anticipated to fadeout but nothing too major...we have had the odd laugh were its been impossible to continue due to shrieking laughter. like the time the long tailed flogger got stuck on the door handle and I hurt my shoulder. or the time my 8 inch heel got stuck in a chain attached to my darlin’s neck causing me to fall off the bed in a undignified manor landing spread eagle on top of a sub spaced Oz who had to rapidly return back to earth or risk strangulation. But all in all our track record of injuries has been limited...Oz has only used his safe word on me once in 9 years which is funny now but at the time I kept going with my actions due to not remembering what his safe word was LOL
It seems on the net you never hear of the things that go wrong. blogs are always pointed towards success. the look what I did theory. the I’m so good I never stuff up theory but the truth is things can and do go wrong sometimes it just mood cant be maintained or the level off what you wanted to achieve just doesn't meet expectations its not that my sub is not good enough or my skills are lacking, its just Life. things can and do go wrong!!
1 week ago
5 comments:
I think almost every Domme has a story of accidentally hitting herself with a flogger or whip.
Kink may not be "normal" but it is full of the same kind of funny mishaps as everything else in life.
You are my new instant hero!! I have talked about the 'things going wrong' moments before and when I've brought it up in online discussion groups before, I basically got the response "we (Dommes) don't make mistakes". Ok, I can see that going a couple of different ways. For one, to repeatedly discuss the mistakes in mixed company (I mean in the presence of subs)takes the away the mystique and that is a lot of what fuels the D/s dynamic. I get that.
But on the other hand, I always thought that it does a dis-service to the newbie Domme and can be dangerous to the newbie sub. They do not have anything from which to learn. To only hear about the times when things are flawless sets up a pressure or expectation to nail it right the first time. That getting into this lifestyle is so seamless. All I can say is thank you for your candor and for resurrecting this gem of a post. Be well.
I'm with Catwoman - it's refreshing to read other Dommes' stories of their less than perfect moments. I'm sure it helps those who are newer to domination too because it lets them know it's ok to be real :)
Nice post, Bonnie :)
Thank you for your comments Richard,catwoman, and Ladyjulia I think weather your in the vanilla world or the Femdom world mistakes should owned up too after all
"to err is human" its how we learn.
I think the best aspect of what you touched on in your post is simply that FemDom play needn't be so serious all the time.
For a FemDom LTR, I think it's vital that the couple can absorb the unexpected 'misses' in playtime or planned activities, and carry on, just enjoying being there for one another, and being together.
My Mistress and I have had play evenings scrubbed due to one or the other of us' stress. Or illness. Or sudden emergency calls by others to whom we owe some support.
And, then, some things like you write about have occurred, too.
Nothing breaks the mood like being taken by your Mistress' strapon, in full thrust, when her cell rings with a distinctive "I must take this call" ringtone. And playtime ends that abruptly.
If our relationship wasn't stronger and deeper than it is, those sorts of moments could be very frustrating, rather than simply being accepted for 'life as usual.'
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